I had completely forgotten these ran at Splice Today way back when.
________

Drat. I have no pants.
The days are cold; the nights, cold.
Here I sit. Help me.

The morning stretches
Like a woozy cat retching
On the alarm clock.

Who hates me? The Web
Will not tell me. Damn broken
Blog counter. Refresh.

Pouring flaming dung
On Legos is sad. Why won’t
You stop, drop, or roll?

“Knock, knock.” “Who’s there?” “In-
terrupting Spider-Man.” “In-
terrupting Spi-“ “Thwip!”